You Have What for Brains?

I watched a boy-racer car zip into the parking lot and come to a screeching halt. It had heavily tinted windows so I could not see the occupants. The car floored it to turn around and left the parking lot in a rush of screeching tires.

The Suspect

On the local news the other night they were reporting on a robbery that occurred.

“The suspect is described as a medium build Hispanic male with dark hair. You are urged to call the police if you see this person or have any information”, the reporter said.

Looking out my window I do believe I see a guy that fits that description. Golly look, there’s another!

Missing Paper

My newspaper didn’t make it this morning so I reported the missing paper. They said paperboy put me on vacation hold because my papers were stacking up. I said that’s not me but my neighbor. She said, oh whoops.

They said they’d have the Missed Paper Dude bring one.

In a few, I get a call from a dispatcher saying missed paper dude can’t get in security gate to the complex. Across the parking lot I can see him at the gate. I give code & she relays it & he still can’t get in. I said if he called me on the callbox I could buzz him in. She said he can’t. I watch him toss the paper over the gate & drive off.

After he drove away, the gate opened.

Drive Much?

Dear Person In Ford Explorer,

If I am making a right turn towards the garage that has just opened, WHY would you shoot past me in the space between my car and said garage? That falls into the category of WTF.

Sincerely,
Me